GOLF...A Real Retired Housewife of Florida Style

I am A REAL RETIRED HOUSEWIFE OF FLORIDA that enjoys golf. I enjoy it more when I don't focus on the scorecard.  It is a good thing that most of the people I play with don't expect golfing skills...just a sense of humor. This blog is about some of my experiences on the golf course (notice no mention of scores or handicaps).

In Ohio, I would start golfing in May and be winding down by September...more of a summer thing. Golfing in Ohio was a great experience. I miss the courses and all of my golfing buddies!

Becoming A REAL RETIRED HOUSEWIFE OF FLORIDA moved golf way up in my priorities. I live in a golfing community and have a house on the 12th green of the Crane's Roost course.

I golf 3 days a week, but instead of 4 months of the year...I golf all year round.  I even golf in the summer (and yes it gets pretty hot out on the course).  This is the temp reading from my golf cart.  Good thing I didn't look at it until after we passed my house.

I golf with a neighborhood group and two ladies groups...lots of casual play and one group that plays by the rules, oh my.  As much as I miss my golfing buddies in Ohio, I have met lots of fun people in Florida.  Here is some of the golfing humor:

     FISH - F*ck, It's Still Here (for when you whiff the ball)

     SBU - Shitty, But Useful (bad hit, but somehow it ended up in a good place)

     Rule of 4 T's - End with Titties To The Target (advice I got when
                                 I wasn't following thru on my swing)

     If You Think...You Stink - Meaning...don't think, just hit the ball

     You a Little Devil - You have 3 6's in a row on your scorecard

I swear I am not making these up!

My favorite

Have you had one of those days when you can hit the ball from the tee, but can't follow up with a second shot?  A friend, Carole, has a saying for that:

A good drive is for naught, when you f*cketh up your second shot

Some fun golf cart bumper signs:

Here are a few pictures of my golfing experiences:

This was a fairway shot that landed in a palm tree about 4 feet up.  I was aiming for the fairway, but the tree got in the way.

Can you see the alligator?  Good thing this guy was on the other side of a large pond.  According to the Florida Wildlife Commission, there are 1.3 million alligators in Florida...gulp!

Just because our course is named after them, the sand cranes think they own the course.  Sometimes it takes patience and skill to avoid them. 

OFF TO GOLF...